From Darkness to LIFE!

The Progressive Realization of My Idea, and Life.

Daddy-Man, A Man, Husband, and Father

I wonder how many others are in the same situation as I am in right now. I have worked consistantly since Sep. 2005. Now I am now temporarily disabled for another 2 months.  Men and women working hard to support their families and one mistake leads to an injury. Some permanent and some temporary. I wish there was a way to encourage, uplift, and motivate others through their situation. Right now everything hurts on my body except my broken ankles. Amazing! Before today I was getting around pretty good, or shall I say crawling around pretty good. I hurt!

I am very grateful that I continue to find ways to stay positive throughout my ordeal. My two littles one took over my dungeon today, and they pretty much ran me out of here today. Watching the Disney Channel, and my son even got mad because my television would not get Disney XD. I told my wife and she just said oh well. So this is what my wife have to deal with while I am out working.

I remember when I drove as a long haul truck driver, and when I would leave for my trips my son would beat on the window crying. You know that was the hardest thing that I had to do. Here it is 5 years later and it still makes me sad to think of those moments. That type of work caused my family hell! I remember vividly when I was in training. My trainer told me that if I had a loving family at home, that over the road truck driver should not be for me. I did not listen. All I could think of is following my dream of being a Truck Driver. I loved driving those trucks and my family suffered, and the money that a first year driver makes is pothetic.  That career move almost caused a divorce. Six and a half years of hell! My uncle trained me with another company and he said he did not want to be at home for long periods of time. I should have listened.

As Tupac said in one of his songs, “It is up to the man in me to conquer this insanity”.  I had programed my self to work and over work, or all of the overtime that I could get to take care of my famliy, and I have not learned how to live. I now work at a plant and when there is an outage, I work the night shift 6 pm to 6 am. Still away from home. It is amazing as I sit here typing this that I now realize that all I was doing was working myself out of a life. Is that what life and famliy is about? No!

It now seems that my accident will allow me an opportunity to get my priorities straight. To get out of the robotic work mode to the wife and children first mode. Don’t get me wrong a man needs to work and provide for his family, but not at the expense of his happiness/sanity nor his family.  I promised my wife that it would be for better or worse! I now realize I have played a major role in making it worst, if not the main role!

I must now sit my wife down and we must develop a financial plan, a marital plan and a famliy plan. I feel that the lack of thoughtful planning has caused me my past and current problems, and this may be why many families fall a part.

It’s time for a change. Starting Friday August 21, 2009!


2009/08/21 - Posted by | Husband, Life |


  1. Just found your blog via, the tag surfer on wordpress, I hope you find the new plan you look for, and get well soon !
    All the best from the UK. Gareth

    Comment by zico01 | 2009/08/21 | Reply

    • Thank you and I am looking forward to this new day!

      Comment by Ivy Butler | 2009/08/21 | Reply

  2. Ivy! You’re the man.

    Comment by Sethy | 2009/08/21 | Reply

    • ward on the journey called life! I never realized how easy it was to get off track. Here is to the next stage of my tomorrows!

      Comment by Ivy Butler | 2009/08/21 | Reply

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